One Day Blog Silence

TV Turn-Off Week: Five Ways to Pass the Time

This week is National TV-Turnoff Week. My family has been TV-free for nearly four years, so this week isn't any different for us than any other with one exception: we're not letting our little guys watch a movie on the laptop. We usually have movie time once or twice a week -- a "privilege" earned from completing a laundry list of preschooler-geared chores. But dropping it for a week is a pretty easy thing to do since it doesn't take up much of our time anyway.

However, for those parents that do have a television, turning it off for the family can be a difficult challenge. I remember our first week without the television. As with the breaking of any habit, distraction is the key to success.

If you're participating in TV-Turnoff Week, you've got four days left. And if you're like me, you're searching for ways to keep yourself busy. Here's the thing -- you know all those things you say you never have time to do because you're too busy? If you turn off the television, you've just opened up some time.

No no, don't go over to your computer or laptop to fill that gap. Don't check your work email. Don't start a new work-related project. Try something else. Something fun.

Here are five things you can do to avoid the tube...and successfully complete TV-Turnoff Week.

-Read a book: If you're like me, you have a list or pile of books that you want to read the next time you have a free moment. So, pick one up and start reading. Maybe it'll turn into a marathon book night. See how many books you can read in a week. Just don't go for The Nannie Diaries (you've been warned).

-Cook or bake: Don't you have a recipe you've always wanted to try? Cookbooks sitting on your shelves collecting dust? Break 'em out and try some new eats. You can also get the kids involved. Check out Mollie Katzen's two children's cookbooks if you need ideas: Pretend Soup and Other Real Recipes: A Cookbook for Preschoolers & Up and Honest Pretzels: And 64 Other Amazing Recipes for Cooks Agest 8 & Up.

-Get outside: I'm in Silicon Valley where we're already experiencing warm air so perhaps I'm spoiled on this one. But with longer days and improving weather, it's so easy to stay outside until early evening. Walks to the local park, neighborhood strolls, family gardening...all great ways to enjoy some time together outdoors.

-Get crafty:  I know, I know...replace one habit with another, right? At least you'll feel productive with this one! Pick up a new hobby -- scrapbooking, painting, sewing. So what if you've never tried. If Mike Adamick can learn how to sew, so can you.

-Sleep. When all else fails, sleep. How many nights have you stayed up late watching television, gone to bed, and then woken up the next morning only to feel exhausted from your late night? So don't do it. We all have read that working moms aren't getting enough rest. So after the kids are in bed, take advantage of some extra quiet time and sleep.

Five Ways to Go Green Without Going Insane

I recently read a story in The New York Times by a reporter who decided to build an outdoor clothesline as a way to save energy. It was beautifully written and almost poetic. Like the reporter, I, too, was soon remembering the days when I was a child and helped my mom and grandmother hang and retrieve clothes from our outdoor clothesline. We even had a indoor clothesline for those foggy San Francisco days.

I started to think about my family's approaching summer and the gorgeous, hot, sun-filled days we experience. Again, like the Times reporter, I envisioned my two sons playing in the backyard while I clipped or unclipped our digs from the clothesline. I could see them running around the towels and sheets drying...such a romantic notion.

I pondered: Why couldn't we build an outdoor clothesline and reduce our energy use during the summer months? And before I knew it, I was telling my husband about my plan.

Suddenly, the record player spinning a tune in my brain began to jump and scratch. Because hello, why would I choose to make my life as a working mom more insane? I can get a load of laundry done and toss another load in the washer before I'm even out the door the morning. Even in the interest of going green, I have to draw the line at practicality.

But the "crazedparent family," as we are dubbed on my personal blog, tries to be as environmentally conscious as possible. And on Earth Day, I thought I'd share my five simple ways for any working mom to help her family go green without going crazy in the process. In fact, these tips may even make your life a little easier.

• Use Method products: The entire line of Method cleaners is biodegradable and non-toxic. The bottles are sleek and classy, and the scents are so good on the nose. We are big fans of the hand sanitizers and soaps. But let me introduce you to their gift to parents everywhere: the ylang ylang daily shower spray. If there's one chore I detest it's scrubbing the shower. And I haven't had to scrub it in a month because this spray prevents buildup. Good stuff. And you can buy it at Target (I just gave you an excuse to go shopping! Yah!)

• Use CleanWell Hand Sanitizer: I think I tell every single mom I meet about CleanWell. Get rid of your bottles of alcohol-reeking Purell and replace it with this non-toxic spray. It's on the pricey side, but well worth it when you think of how many times a day you need to wash or spritz your kid's hands.

• Buy locally-grown produce: It's spring, which means that your local Farmer's Market scene should be swinging into full gear. Enjoy a morning or afternoon outdoors with your kids while you pick up some delicious fruit, veggies and other organically grown goodies.

• Pay your bills online: If your bank allows you to pay bills online, use it. No envelopes, no stamps, no trips to the post office on your lunch break. What more can you ask for?

• Stop buying books about Mommy Wars.  Seriously, think of all the trees that died to print copies of books that simply get us all riled up and into heated debates about a concept that we'd just as soon leave back on the steps of our old high schools.

Hope you had a great Earth Day! And by all means, share your tips to go green without going insane.

The Mom Ramp, Part 3: Taking Charge

Editor's Note: A few months ago my friend, fellow blogger and working mom, HipMamaB, quit her corporate gig. A job loved and worked her tail off to climb the corporate ladder. She jumped into the world of being a stay-at-home mom, while the wheels of work still turned in her head. And I instanly knew that hers was a story that should be told. It's a challenge and dilemma that so very many working moms face, day in and day out -- the inevitable question: "What should I do with my life?" HipMamaB's first post was about her immediate jump from being a working mom to a stay-at-home mom. In part two, she tells of her first days as a stay-at-home mom.

This week, she shares the third and final installment of her story about The Mom Ramp. In "Taking Charge," you'll find out what happened when HipMamaB decided to make more changes in her life as she ventures out and starts her own consulting business.

A huge thank you to HipMamaB for giving us a real slice of the tough decisions and challenges she faced on The Mom Ramp.

Taking Charge

While I was working out of the house, I felt rushed and hurried like I had no time for myself. Yet all of a sudden I was home all day – with absolutely no time to myself. While it’s such a mom cliché, I realized that I didn’t even have five minutes to go to the bathroom. At work, I took more time for myself because I felt I needed to keep sane; now that I’m working from home I feel as if I “have” that extra time during the day, so I don’t take it “after hours” as much anymore. 

When I left the traditional workforce, my main fears were that I would be lonely and that I wouldn’t grow or excel professionally. But the opposite has really been true. Working for myself has forced me to open up and expand in ways that I never had before, and may not have in my previous position. And as far as the social aspect goes, I’ve learned to relish days where I actually have an hour or two for myself.

A few days ago I was back, dressed in my suit and heels walking downtown to a meeting with a client and for a moment I felt a twinge. I suddenly remembered what it was like to be a professional, smart, put- together person. I found myself almost missing it and even let myself think about the possibilities -- jobs I could get, directions I could go in.

After my successful meeting with my client, I found myself thinking more about going back to dedicating myself full-time to a corporate job. And I kept wondering, why? Why would I want to do that again when I was finally achieving something on my own?

The answer is actually pretty simple: comfort. While one may feel tied down in a corporate job, there is comfort in that restraint. When you are freelancing or contracting there is no stability. It's just you ...letting it all hang out for the world to see...waiting for some validation.

It can be daunting. It can be horrifying. And you wrestle with those feelings each and every day. Then one morning you find yourself cuddling with your little one at 8:00 am and checking your email while still in your slippers, and you realize just how wonderful the feeling of being in control of your own destiny can really be.

You can also read more of Beth's writing at her personal blog, LaLaLaLand.

Working Moms, Thinking Bloggers

I post this a bit late but nonetheless, I post it with much thought because Self-Made Mom, Sara, bestowed the Thinking Blogger Award to Job-Mom and moi. (Thanks Sara!).

So, it's now it's my turn to hand out some Thinking Blogger Awards to five blogs that make me think. Here goes!

1. Woulda Coulda Shoulda - Mir's post alway, always make me think. And laugh. So much so that we strong-armed her to write for The Sandbox at Maya's Mom.

2. The Salad Day Chronicles by Alisyn (who also writes for Strollerderby) - It's hard to write, but it's super hard to write and make your stories sound like sheer poetry.

3. How She Really Does It by Wendy Sachs - This working mama doesn't post nearly enough because I always want to hear what she has to say.

4. Shimelle - Crafty scrappers like the famed Shimelle make you think...about memories. That's always a good thing.

5. Her Bad Mother - I think her blog name says it all. She's brazen and sassy. Love it.

If you haven't checked out these blogs, you should. And if you are one of these blogs, go out and bestow the Thinking Blogger Award to five blogs that make you think.

A Typical Chaotic Day for a Working Mom

This post by Amy Dunkin over at BusinessWeek's Working Parents Blog made me laugh because its so authentic. Meaning, I could identify 100 percent with how Amy captured her day as a writer. But what really made me smile was how at the end of the post, she throws in the towel on trying to capture her thoughts for this post...

"Just trying to write this column, I was interrupted at least half a dozen times. Talk about functioning with only half your brain in gear.

In fact, my son is now telling me something about school and I have lost my train of thought. I'll just have to figure out where I'm going with all this in another posting."

Just another day in the jungle of working motherhood.

The Mom Ramp, Part 2: The New Stay-at-Home Mom

Editor's Note: A few months ago my friend, fellow blogger and working mom, HipMamaB, quit her corporate gig. A job loved and worked her tail off to climb the corporate ladder. She jumped into the world of being a stay-at-home mom, while the wheels of work still turned in her head. And I instanly knew that hers was a story that should be told. It's a challenge and dilemma that so very many working moms face, day in and day out -- the inevitable question: "What should I do with my life?"

HipMamaB's first post was about her immediate jump from being a working mom to a stay-at-home mom. This week, she shares part two of her story..."The New Stay-at-Home Mom, Day One. Want to know how she spent her new-found time? Read on...

The New Stay-At-Home Mom

I used to have this dream of quitting my job. I mostly had it during that last 10-minutes of sleep on Monday mornings before having to get out of bed and start my week. But it went something like this:

...I would waltz into my boss' office, poised and confident holding a neatly folded letter in my hands. I would sit down, smile and go and on about how much I loved my job. But I was making the decision to leave to spend more time with my child. Then I would hand over my letter of resignation and skip out of the office as they begged me to stay or freelance on events and projects for them. End of story.

Since dreams are so rarely like reality, I was put into a much different, not so cheery, situation. With the support and encouragement of my husband, I resigned effective immediately, and dove head first into to world of being a stay-at-home mom.

The first day of what I had always considered “freedom” was like a holiday. I stayed in my pajamas until mid-afternoon. I made elaborate plans for what I was going to do with all my extra time. On day four, when my husband came home I was burning dinner for the second time that week. It was that point where my emotions took over and I just started crying.

I kept focusing on how I had lost my place in the professional world. How lost I was being a stay-at-home mom. As someone so used to corporate life -- getting something done, getting it approved, seeing results and moving on –- I was having a hard time adjusting to a world where I wouldn’t see the real “results” of my actions for another 18 or so years.

At that point I made the decision to try and pick up some work... something that would keep my mind in the game. I had a great network of people and before I knew it I had my first freelancing gig.

Next Week: Part Three -- Taking Charge

You can also read more of Beth's writing at her personal blog, LaLaLaLand.

Business Trip, Family Style

Is the business trip going family style? Perhaps. According to a recent story from the Associated Press, more working parents who travel on occasional business trip are more willing to bring their families along for the ride.

According to -- drum roll -- a study conducted by the National Business Travel Association, the increase in family-style working vacations" is partly due to the "growing number of single parents, women in executive ranks, two-income families, and those simply looking to save a buck by turning company-paid trips into working vacations." To accomodate this growth, hotels and conference planners are adding childcare services and adding other kid-friendly perks to list of offerings.

The last time I had an official business trip was three years ago and I spent four days in Las Vegas. And I'll be perfectly honest: while it would have been nice to have my 2-year-old son and husband with me, I had much more fun, I mean, I got more work done, without them. Oh who am I kidding. I partied like a rock star.

Because sometimes, just sometimes, mommy needs a break.

My husband is the business trip dude in our family. The destination is a Southern California beach town (I know, what's up with that?) and we frequently discuss him planning a Friday trip so I can fly down with the boys and spend the weekend in this hipster little city. But it's not an official business trip for him at that point. It's the weekend.

As for me, I have two business trips lined up in the next few months. The first, when I become a Rock Star SuperMama for three days at Ladies Rock Camp and the second, when I attend the annual BlogHer conference in Chicago. My husband and I discussed whether or not we could turn these two trips into family vacations because both locations are incredibly family friendly. But the truth is that I will literally be in classes, workshops and social events for both trips. I would hate to be completely immersed in an activity and then have to leave because I had planned a date with my boys, and then resent that they came on the trip. And I know they would be miserable wanting mommy to come with them everywhere and I'd have to say no. I need to focus

And again, the honesty factor, I wouldn't mind having a little "me time." I love the recharging my batteries, coming home and feeling refreshed, and being 200 percent more smitten with my boys. And they with me, because we have a renewed appreciated for our time together. I also like my boys to see me travel on my own.

Now, if I traveled more frequently, perhaps I'd be singing a different song. But for now, any business trip I take will not be family style.

What about you? Do you take your family on business trips? Would you? And 'fess up...what do you like about solo business trips?

The Nanny Diaries: I Feel So Cheated!

I love books.

In my pre-mom days, I could spend entire weekends lazily reading around the house, and getting through an entire novel. But since I've had my sons, I rarely have time to lazily do anything.

I don't think I read a single book for fun (meaning, all my other reads were parenting-related books) until my oldest son was more than a year old. The book was The Dirty Girls Social Club by Alisa Valdes Rodriguez, one of my all-time favorite Chica Lit writers. I crawled into bed after the baby was asleep and picked up the book. I stayed awake all night reading it. And then I went to work on a few hours sleep. But unlike being up to the wee hours with a sick or crying baby, staying up all night to read a book -- a good book -- was invigorating. I was damned tired, but a good tired.

Since that night, this late-night reading scenario happens at least once a month, if not twice. It's a big deal, this staying-up-all-night-to-read when you have two kids ages five and under. There is hell to pay for me the next morning when they come charging into my bed ready for play time. But I'll do the time since I love a good read.

But there's a slight problem when I stay up all night only to find the book is a stinker.

I feel cheated.

I just finished the The Nanny Diaries by Nicola Kraus and Emma McLaughlin. (It's not a new release by any account, but I'm still catching up on my fiction!) And let me tell you not only did I feel cheated, I was down right pissed off that I had wasted time reading it.

Before I picked up the book, I read the reviews of Nanny Diaries. The New York Times called it "diabolically funny," so I'm thinking, wow -- this has to be good, right? They even got Scarlett Johansson to star in the yet-to-be released movie. And I've had friends tell me it's a "must read." Sure, when you have lots of time on your hands. But when you read books in 8-hour marathon stretches, please, I beg of you, pass on The Nanny Diaries.

Why?

Because the characters and relationships are completely underdeveloped. There were no references to Nanny's background. I couldn't even paint a picture in my head of what Nanny looked like. I couldn't understand why a 21-year-old college student would allow herself to get so sucked into her employers life so much that she'd allow herself to be treated so poorly.

Each character is glossed over. Events and transitions in the book happen so quickly that I was left wondering what I’d missed. Was an entire chapter ripped out of my copy? Because clearly something must have happened in between the pages I was reading.

Sure, I could have tossed the book aside and cut my losses. But I don't play that way. Once I'm invested in the book, I'm going all the way to the bitter end. And in my book, The Nanny Diaries was definitely bitter.

The only saving grace for me was that I read the book on Friday night. I at least didn't have to wake up and go to work. But still.

I was cheated.

What book made you feel cheated? And when do you have time to read?

 

The Mom Ramp: From Working Mom to Stay-at-Home Mom, Part One

Editor's Note: A few months ago my friend, fellow blogger and working mom, HipMamaB, quit her corporate gig. A job loved and worked her tail off to climb the corporate ladder. She jumped into the world of being a stay-at-home mom, while the wheels of work still turned in her head. And I instanly knew that hers was a story that should be told. It's a challenge and dilemma that so very many working moms face, day in and day out -- the inevitable question: "What should I do with my life?"

Following is a guest post from HipMamaB. It's the first in a three-part series that will look at her journey from working mom to stay at home mom...and more than mom. By sharing her story with you, we hope that you'll get a real-life glimpse of what it feels like to make this leap. It's not all peaches and cream, u you knew that. Right?!

Years ago I had this master plan in my head of how my life was going to go. I was going to pay my dues in the corporate world, work hard and climb up that ladder. Then when my husband and I were ready to have kids, I would transition nicely into freelancing and working from home. Yet, like all the best-laid plans we have mapped out for our lives, ten weeks after the birth of my son I found myself barely squeezing into my new, two-sizes bigger than normal black suit, packing up the “discreet” Pump in Style breast pump and heading back to work. Oh, and to a brand new job to boot.

Leading up to the moment I left the house that morning, I had cried at least once a day for ten days straight. Somehow on that day, though, I didn’t cry once.

I came home exhilarated, reeking of that “new job smell.” I was proud. I was proud that I could do this. That I could have the career that always wanted and still be the mom that I wanted to be.

This “working-mom high” didn’t last long. Baby illnesses, daycare woes and a slew of non-understanding bosses forced me to make a decision between work and family.

And my decision was my child.

Next Week: Part Two -- The New Stay at Home Mom: Day One...

You can also read more of Beth's writing at her personal blog, LaLaLaLand.